Oh… Yo Bad! 🥴

At this point in our lives, we’ve all had our fair share of life experiences, whether it be relationships (romantic or friendly) or our pursuits of happiness or success. We’ve been there, done that, and got the T-shirt. We’ve all experienced some form of happiness or success in some capacity, right? Maybe you’ve won a competitive spelling bee or a little league championship or finally got a date with that girl or guy you’ve been crushing on for a while. Or maybe you’ve got a big job promotion!… “Yes, I deserve that. I worked hard for it.” You confidently say to yourself, relishing in the victory at that moment. We have no problem taking credit for the things that go right in our lives. NOT. AT. ALL. 

But…what about when things don’t go so directly? How do you react? What is your mentality? Are you bold enough to accept your part in what may not have gone in your favor? Or do you effortlessly pass the blame onto others? Let’s take a deeper dive into why personal accountability matters. 

What is Personal Accountability?

Personal accountability is the belief that you are fully responsible for your actions and consequences. It’s the power of choice, a mindset, and even an expression of integrity. It’s acknowledging and being completely willing to accept the outcomes of your personal behavior, preferences, and feelings. It’s being accountable and willing to accept the result, good or bad. It’s taking OWNERSHIP. There is empowerment in being personally liable.

Adverse Effects of a Lack of Personal Accountability.

• Loss of Personal Ownership.

Have you ever uttered the saying, “You made me do this,” when reacting to a situation or when offended, whether intentionally or unintentionally? Do you constantly look elsewhere when analyzing circumstances instead of taking the necessary introspective approach for personal growth? Heavy questions. If so, we must put our best foot forward by stopping and looking in the mirror. Because whether we’d like to admit it or not, NO one controls our actions. It’s solely up to YOU to choose how to respond to circumstances, how to process failure, misunderstandings, etc., and what steps to take moving forward. When we allow outside factors or others to control our actions, we are giving them control of our being.

• Development of a Victim Mentality/ Stagnancy. 

Blaming others for our circumstances rarely yields positive results. Blame allows us to hate or blame others for what we didn’t become or achieve, etc., giving us permanent residence on a stagnant street. No one wants to live there. When you lack personal accountability, you cannot see your faults, closing your eyes to the possibility that you could be your worst enemy. If you never acknowledge a personal flaw or are unwilling to know that you could have it, how can you fix it? And the survey says?… You can’t. 

Taking personal accountability is a difficult task. It takes a brave soul to acknowledge personal shortcomings and engage in humility and true honesty in wanting to be a better person. Personal accountability means being mature enough to own up to problems you may have caused and having the humility and discipline to change the behavior. 

• Lack of True, Meaningful Friendships/Relationships

When you lack personal accountability, you lack commitment. When you lack commitment, you are untrustworthy. When you are unreliable, how can anyone grow to TRULY value and befriend you? Someone can tolerate us, but is that truly meaningful? No. When you lack personal accountability, it will even reflect in the relationships that you develop. In meaningless relationships/friendships, NO ONE will hold you accountable. Responsibility tends to be evasive. 

Those unwilling to self-reflect build relationships with others who don’t challenge them for the better or who often see the world precisely as they do. These are what I call surface relationships. You can do no wrong in your own eyes, so as a result, you develop surface relationships with others who validate your inability to see personal shortcomings. How can we grow from that? 

The truth is, we can’t. This behavior can also push away potential meaningful friendships/relationships because you will perceive loving correction as an insult. We can even say that lack of accountability is a significant relationship repellent. 

Benefits of Personal Accountability

• Trustworthiness
  One benefit of personal accountability is trustworthiness. Being humble and brave enough to engage in introspection shows a willingness to accept responsibility. An accountable and responsible person is often an honest person. 

• Empowerment
  Tell me, What’s better than TRULY being in control of your destiny? There is an indescribable feeling of liberation when you realize you have dominion over your circumstances.  

• Discovery of Leadership Capacity
  Being personally accountable will put you in great company. What is one thing that all great leaders have in common? They WILLINGLY accept personal accountability. No questions asked. They understand the importance and severity of this character trait.

In summary, the journey toward personal accountability is one that we all should embrace. It’s a road far less traveled than it should be; however, the benefits of its actualization are LIFE-CHANGING.

Yours in Truth,

Brandon Hicks